Page 57 - South Mississippi Living - September, 2017

1. RECOGNIZE “SMALL TALK” as your friend. How often do we hear folks say they hate small talk. No! Think about it — every personal and business relationship has begun with small talk. Small talk is how we evaluate whether we want a relationship to grow into a deeper one.
2. “SMALL TALK” CAN BE EASY. Instead of dreading meeting a new person and small talk, welcome it!
a. Introduce the other party’s favorite subject — himself or herself. Ask open-ended questions
such as: What is the most interesting aspect of your job? Why did you choose your particular career path? What person significantly helped you along the way? What was the most fun adventure about your recent trip? Hopefully, the other party will reciprocate by asking you some open-ended questions.
b. Compliment the person’s attire.
c. Congratulation him/her on a recent new job/promotion/award.
3. CULTIVATE, NURTURE AND PRACTICE THE GIFT OF LISTENING. How long has it been since you earnestly listened to your child, your spouse, your colleague or an adversary without interrupting and without thinking about your reply? How long has it been since someone gave you the gift of listening? As you practice this generous gift, make sure you maintain good eye contact, use proper body language (lean in a bit), and just listen. Practice this skill regularly and expect your personal
and business dealings to improve dramatically.
4. WHEN YOU COMMUNICATE VERBALLY, MAKE SURE THE WORDS YOU CHOOSE ARE THE WORDS THAT CONVEY THE MESSAGE CLEARLY. Think about the words you say before
they’re uttered. Increase your vocabulary to include new words that express thoughts more succinctly. Communication is successful when the message you send is understood as you intended.
5. WHEN YOU COMMUNICATE VERBALLY, BE SURE YOUR BODY LANGUAGE AND ACTIONS ARE CONGRUENT WITH YOUR WORDS. Keep good eye contact, a pleasant facial expression, and an engaged posture. If you say you’re going to follow through with a certain action, make sure you do.
6. Remember: IT’S NOT WHAT YOU SAY; IT’S HOW YOU SAY IT.” In other words, be tactful; disagree without being disagreeable. As Isaac Newton put it, “Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.”
a. IT’S OKAY TO SAY “NO.” Whether in a personal or business setting, preface the “no” with a kind qualifier such as “I would like to, but I already have plans for this evening.” Or “ I hear you; however, it’s my practice not to engage in office here say.”
b. IF A CONTROVERSIAL TOPIC IS INTRODUCED, IT’S FINE TO EXPRESS YOUR OPINION IN A TACTFUL MANNER. You may say, “I understand and respect your position; however my opinion differs for the following reasons:...” or “I’ve listened to what you say; however, my reading and research have led me to believe.....”
c. DON’T SHY AWAY FROM CONTROVERSY. Respond head on with understanding, respect, and kindness. I believe, in the end, people will respect you for having opinions and are willing to articulate them within a civil discussion.
As you might surmise, these tips only scratch the surface
of the broad topic of effective communication. It’s worth our time and effort to become better communicators every single day. I challenge you to practice these tips and others with resolve.
Professional Edge Business Etiquette and Life Skills Consulting
228.327.0183 wilsonnl2000@yahoo.com
I promise better communication skills will improve your family life, your community life, and your business life.
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September 2017 • SOUTH MISSISSIPPI Living 57